The asymmetrical life partner
It is often difficult for me to explain to people what I’m looking for in a partner. I suppose that is why I rarely talk to people about it.
“I’m looking for someone who doesn’t necessarily have career aspirations,” I’ll often stay to a friend.
“So, you’re looking for a house wife.” They respond.
Quite the contrary. I don’t want a Stepford wife, but I also don’t want a Stepford employee. They are both the same to me. I don’t like it when people purely define success based on their career.
They have to be passionate about something though. I would argue there are a lot of people who are passionate about something that isn’t related to a job or career, yet there is a societal pressure (on both men and women) to have some career aspiration.
Why force yourself to do something that doesn’t make you happy? Take money out of the equation for a moment and ponder the thought.
Of you don’t want to have a job and focus on your home decor craft, then do that instead of slaving away at a soul-crushing job. If your dream is to have an oyster farm then stop emailing and start shucking!
I want someone who is passionate about their life, man. They aspire to be the best pet owner, concert goer, or life lover…just as much or as hard as people do with their jobs or careers.
What I look for is someone who is really interested in partnering up to build an ideal life. Equality is important, but it can also be asymmetrical. Why do people feel everything needs to be split 50/50? If someone is really good at one thing, why not let them do it 100% and the other person focuses on their 100%.
I am horrible at taking care of a place. This includes cleaning, but a bunch of other things. I would like to come home to a place that feels cozy. I haven’t felt that way since I left my parents home and went to college. Every place I have lived feels like a temporary solution. I’d like to find someone who can make me feel at home.
I’m good at other things though, like doing the dishes. I absolutely love washing the dishes. I’m good at working and making money as a result of it. However, the most important part is I absolutely love what I do. It is a passion.
I guess what I wonder is why people have to succumb to societal pressures of having some sort of career success. If it happens to be what both people want, then more power to them. However, I am seeking something else…someone who is passionate at working on life.
Let’s build a life, not just a career path.